Step 1. Introduce yourself.
Introduce yourselves — who you are, what you’re like, and what you like. Describe in very brief detail what you do for a living and for fun. This is what will likely stick with the reader, the rest is just bonus details. You want this portion to be reflective of you in voice, tone, and energy. This is the section that will “hook” the reader in and make them want to get to know you more, or skip ahead to the next hopeful parent profile. You don’t want to “sell” yourself, but you want to let the reader know who you are. Be authentic, be genuine, be you.
“Hi! We are Garret and Leigh from Houston. We’d like to offer you an insight into who we are and the unconditional love we can provide a child. Garret was born and raised right here in Houston and attended Southern Texas University, where he met and fell madly in love with Leigh, a small-town Conroe native. Garret is a neonatal nurse who has a passion for overcoming challenges and offering hope to parents. Leigh is a 2nd grade teacher who enjoys craft and music time the most, but is the go-to math teacher and tutor at her elementary school.”
Step 2. Give a glimpse into your life.
Offer a glimpse into your life as individuals, as a couple, and as a family or prospective parents. You don’t need to go too in-depth or offer specific details, but a casual overview of what your life looks like will make the birth parents consider where their baby will fit in and how you’ll make time to raise them.
“We have been married since the summer of 2017 and share our home with our cat, Roscoe. Garret’s three-day work week schedule leaves him plenty of time to pursue his hobbies of marathon running and casual frisbee golf in the local parks — he’s already been jogging stroller shopping! When Leigh isn’t at school, she is the assistant coach for the youth soccer team at our community rec center or you can find her baking up a storm in the kitchen — she loves to cook and entertain. Garret’s entire family lives in Houston and Leigh’s in Conroe, so we spend the weekends with our 7 nieces and nephews aged two-months to 12 years.”
Step 3. Explain why you’re adopting and what you can offer a child.
A brief explanation of why you are interested in adoption allows you to speak to the birth parents and remind them not only of the gift they are offering hopeful parents, but also the motivation behind your willingness to provide that love to someone else’s baby. In this section, you’ll want to connect emotionally without delving too deeply into your own failed attempts at conceiving. You don’t want the birth parents to think you are guilting them into choosing you.
“The courage and strength you have to make such important decisions for you and your baby is tremendous and we want to commend you for it. Garret was placed into foster care at the age of 8, where he remained in different homes until he was adopted by his parents at the age of 12. Both of us are from very large families — Garret has 8 siblings between his birth family and adopted family, and Leigh has 4 sisters — so having children has never been a question. From a young age, Garret had decided that when he built his family, he would adopt a child just as his parents did and Leigh was delighted to begin the journey to make his parental dreams come true and welcome a baby to call her own.”
Step 4. Paint a picture of your family, home, and neighborhood.
Paint a picture of your family, home, neighborhood, and community that allows the birth parents to visualize where their child will be living and how you can offer them a good life. Discuss the ways that a child will fit into your life, including whether you have a large family home on some land, or you plan to upgrade your downtown townhouse. Do you know what the school system is like or what child-friendly activities or opportunities there are?
“We understand that you’ll want to make sure that you are offering the best possible life for your baby, so let us show what we can offer! While we are not the most well-to-do family in our neighborhood, we live in the Woodlands, a suburb of northern Houston. Our community is known for its top-notch school system (which Leigh can attest to firsthand!) and diversity. We love living here because it offers easy access to all that Houston has to offer and is just a short distance from Leigh’s family in Conroe. Both Garret and Leigh are incredibly close with their families, which offers plenty of grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins hopeful to welcome your baby home too!”
Step 5. Explain your parenting beliefs.
Offering some insight into your parenting beliefs will help extinguish some anxiety birth parents may have about how their baby will fare in your custody. You don’t need to go into detail about specific behaviors or techniques, but a general overview of how you do, or plan to, manage children is encouraged. Do you plan to raise them in the church? What are some values you plan to instill? If you are already a parent, you can include some bits about how you manage your children now, and if you don’t, it’s okay to use some hypotheticals.
“While we’d like to say we have this parenting thing pretty figured out, the truth is, we have the aunt/uncle thing pretty figured out! What we think offers us a great advantage to many new parents, though, is that we both work with young children, we have plenty of siblings and are both very close with our parents, and we have 7 nieces and nephews that we spend time with regularly. We haven’t quite figured out the Santa Clause or Tooth Fairy tales, but the things we value and will instill in our children is honesty, integrity, and compassion. We have our meals as a family and never go to bed without thanking God for the day He blessed us with, together.”
Step 6. Discuss thoughts on relationships with birth parents.
Discussing your thoughts in regards to the relationship with the birth parents is important to take some time considering. And, it is critical to be honest. If you’d prefer to adopt a child and raise them as your own without involving the birth parents, you’ll need to communicate that. If you want an open relationship where the birth parents interact with the child, you’ll need to state that. Everyone’s adoption journey is different, and each birth mother and hopeful parents have differing ideas, so it’s important to find compatible people and set realistic expectations.
“We plan to be transparent and honest with the child we adopt about their adoption. Our families know that we are hoping to adopt instead of attempting to conceive and are ready to open their arms and hearts to a child and/or their birth parents. We will leave your level of involvement up to you and we are aware that it may change over time, and we are okay with that. If we adopt your baby, you will be our family, too.”
Step 7: Detail excitement and encourage a reply.
The wrap-up, or conclusion, should leave a lasting impression on the reader, create an emotional connection, and invite reciprocal interaction. Express your excitement and commitment — all-in — and be sure to include a way that they can reach out to you. Some birth parents may not yet be working with the agency where your adoption profile is listed and simply conducting their research first. Let them know that you are already taking steps and are ready to become their baby’s adoptive family.
“We are so proud of you for making the ultimate act of love by placing your baby for adoption and are honored that you have read our adoption profile so that we may be considered as the adoptive family. We are excited to become parents and offer unconditional love to a child. We have plenty of room in our lives and our hearts! We look forward to learning more about you and answering any additional questions you may have. If you’d like to connect more, please contact the case worker at AIM Adoptions — we hope to hear from you soon!”
